Wednesday, 10 November 2010
First Date Utterances To Keep Sealed
First dates can be a joyous thing, equally, they can be a nightmare with the wrong person. Here's my spin on things to not say on a first date.
1)No really, I think Hitler was misunderstood.
2)My ex and I had sex in the toilet here.
3)I'm weaning myself off Prozac, yeah I'm seeing the world in colour now.
4)I really think if you psychologically damage children at a younger age it makes them stronger human beings you know?
5)I didn't say you needed a nose job, it might be worth thinking about.
6)Man: Could you get this bill? I'm broke. Cheers.
7)They were assholes at my last job. I totally had my multiple personality disorder under control.
8)I met my ex through a dating/pen pals site for prison inmates.He was doing time for double murder.Maan he looked good in that prison uniform. Fuck the system!
9)Man:If you come back to my place you can meet Lolani my blow up sex doll.
10)Man:You remind me of my pet hamster Dirty Harry.It's the way you eat, it's kind of erratic.You should really do something about that.